Are Men really Dogs?

Time and time again I have had conversations with women where we get together and bash men. Going through our experiences and agreeing with each other that men are horrible little creatures. However, I am really beginning to wonder if men are really dogs? Or is it that we as women allow men to treat us any which way they please? Honestly, can a man really do anything to us that we do not want him to do? How many times have we had dealings with a man who is no good, yet for some strange reason we ignore the signs and continue to allow this man deeper and deeper into our lives.

Recently I received a call from an individual that I have known for a number of years. We have always had a flirtatious thing going but nothing more than talk. We exchanged the new communication number of choice, blackberry pins. That should have been the first red flag. Anyways so a few weeks go by and we communicate via BBIM and everything is good. Minding my own business Mr. Man starts to tell me that he likes me and he wants to see me, telling me we could meet for breakfast or lunch. That was a first for me because those are both daytime activities and I was wondering why not dinner. Well a breakfast date for me is out of the question because I usually leave home at 8 to get to work for 8 if you catch my drift. By lunchtime I am usually swamped doing things so I usually don’t get to leave the office. We finally agreed that we would go out for drinks. After all of the talk he gave me he stood me up, which I have no problem with because I was home in comfort.

The thing that irritates me the most about this guy is that his excuse for not coming was that he was sleeping. The following day when I told him that I was not pleased he could not understand why I was upset. Apparently I was just supposed to be cool with being stood up. Subsequently, yes I continued speaking to him via BBIM no doubt, he told me he wanted to check me home. The concept of men “checking” me at home is a little pet peeve of mine for a number of reasons. Most often when men visit you at home they come empty handed. The woman then has to entertain the man by providing drinks and food. In other words it is a great way to freeload. Additionally, no one sees us together so it is a wonderful trick for womanizing men. Now nothing is wrong with staying in, but doing so in the beginning of the relationship is definitely not good because it sets a precedent.

Based on this scenario, are men really dogs? I honestly don’t think so. At this stage it is totally up to me whether or not I continue to interact with this man and what our level of interaction would be. If I continue to “date” him and then in a few months he is still up to these tricks I would have no one to blame but myself. In which case he wouldn’t be a dog, he would be a smart man and I would be a damn fool.

What do you think? Are men really dogs?

Mr. Right or Mr. Right Now?

As a woman there have been several times in my life when I have felt that I was wronged by a man. However, is it really the man’s fault? Many times we as women meet a man who we know is no good for us, yet we continue in the hopes of some magic transformation. I am not saying that the sneaky lying men are not out there or that they don’t exist, because trust me they do exist. I am saying and admitting to the world that we as women create some of the heart ache and troubles that we encounter. For example, if you meet a man who openly tells you that he is not interested in a relationship at this time, then he isn’t. Nothing is going to change that man, unless you have a good script writer, director, producer and a hell of a theme song. So why stick around? Even if he does change his mind there is no guarantee that you are going to be the one he picks, because Lord knows you are not the only one that he is “not being in a relationship with”. It is ok to be alone, just move on. Use the time to do some abdominals and cardio because carnival is always just months away.

Then there are the men who we know are no good for us, we don’t even need them to tell us, we just know for ourselves. These are usually the really cute popular ones who like themselves more than God. The ones who live in their parents’ house, don’t have a dime saved, always by their favourite bar or liming spot, and always in the latest most expensive brand name clothing. This type of man is no good, simply because he is not interested in anyone but himself. He is never going to put any woman ahead of his lifestyle. Even if he commits to one woman he is not going to be involved financially, emotionally or even spiritually. However don’t get vex with the man, just see him for what he is. And that is the wrong man for you right now. He is not bad generally, he is just bad for you. Unless of course you are looking for penis escapades and want to have a good time then this type of man is just for you.


So ladies the next time you meet a guy and before you fall deeply in love and then go crazy on the man when it doesn’t work out. Ask yourself, is this really the right man for me right now?

Blackberry Instant Messenger is the Death of Traditional Romance

Forgive me if I am old, but I grew up in the age prior to cellphones. Cellphones became popular after I left secondary school. Recently thanks to Bmobile and Digicel the Blackberry has become the cellphone of choice for the masses. BBIM is an application that facilitates blackberry to blackberry messaging at no additional cost as long as both devices have a data plan. So for the last three years while I had five people in my BBIM contact list I now have about thirty. It has now become a trend when you meet a new guy to exchange pins instead of phone numbers. While this may be the modern thing to do, I think it takes away from the romance of a new encounter. Dating has actually been reduced to random disjointed messages. This is annoying on several levels. First Bmobile has proven itself to be probably the most unreliable mobile network in the universe hence there is no guarantee that the messages would be delivered in a timely manner, if even delivered at all. Secondly it allows womanizing men to carry on multiple conversations with various members of their harem. Therefore you no longer have the undivided attention of this man while chatting with him or in person because he is constantly tied to his phone. Third, men no longer feel the need to even pay for a phone call to make contact. And do not be fooled ladies the savings from these calls would not be seen in an improvement in the quality of dates. Finally, BBIM makes people think it is ok to message you all hours of the day or night. As opposed to a call where you would have to think about what the person may or may not be doing prior to placing the call. There is a reason that Machel did not sing “BBIM me anytime you want” and Jah Cure certainly did not sing “If you need a lover BBIM me”. That being said the next man to pick up the phone and call me I feel I will instantly fall in love simply because it has been so long. How has BBIM affected your dating life? Do you prefer dating life with or without BBIM?